Kimit A. Muston - Arnold - I Won't Be Back

The Essays of Kimit A. Muston

Arnold, I Won't Be Back

Apr 26, 2001

I've had a firm rule against offering advice to multi-millionaire movie stars since that Charleton Heston/"Soylent Green" restaurant-chain fiasco. But rules are made to be broken, and I just have to tell Mr. Schwarzenegger, I think he made the right decision.

Arnold was the Great White Hope of the California Republican party, an organization currently smaller than the Pauly Shore fan club. They wanted Arnold to flash his smile, his muscle and his millions in 2002 to challenge current Governor, Democrat Gray Davis (Or Governor Rolling F. Black-Out, as he is affectionately known in some parts of the state).

But Arnold has been wavering for weeks. ("Governor of California? Movie Star? Governor of California? Movie Star?") and that's understandable because being Governor would involve a significant loss of income and status for Mr. Schwarzenegger. Besides, Arnold is still a very successful actor, with future films stacked up on his calendar. As he said himself, "I'm in a most wonderful position." And a career in politics would involve some non-wonderful positions, first being when the Republican Right Wing gave him a political prostate exam.

You see Arnold is in favor of gun control and abortion rights, both popular positions everywhere in California except in the monastic right wing of the Republican party. And no Republican candidate can afford to offend conservatives. I mean, look how much good they've done the state party so far.

So faced with that un-welcome wagon Arnold decided not to run for Governor, leaving the party to stew in it's own ideology. And he announced his decision in typical movie star fashion; with a private phone call to a particular newspaper and a particular unidentified reporter, whom, I suspect, does not regularly cover politics - thus avoiding the possibility of any unpleasant questions. (Mustn't challenge the movie star.)

What this means for Governor Davis's political future is absolutely nothing. Since the L.A. transit unions slapped his face with impunity - they told Davis their strike would end if he signed a bill they wanted; He signed and the strike kept going - it has been evident the governor was missing something. Who knew it was kilowatts?

Politically, Davis is now the hemophiliac in the shark tank. He acts like Woodrow Wilson - too proud to fight; an admirable trait in a youth minister but not the guy you want in the lion's dean negotiating with merciless greedy folks like the executives at Pacific Gas & Electric. Why did Gray Davis trust these guys? Didn't he see "Erin Brockovich"?

PG&E declared bankruptcy without warning, punching a hole in the Governor's solution to the state's energy crises and screwing not only their own customers but every other rate payer in the state as well. But what did Davis expect them to do? The honorable thing? Get real.

It may hurt voters to admit it but Gray Davis may be too good for California. And since the Republicans have rendered themselves toothless (thanks to Pete Wilson and Chuck Quackenbush, amongst others) politics in California has been reduced to cannibalism.

There are rumors that Senator Dianne Finestein has been asked to come home to save the state. But that would leave Barbara Boxer in Washington, D.C. unattended, and who knows what trouble she could get into without a nanny. And then there is State Controller Kathleen Connell, late of the L.A. mayor's race, who has raised some questions about the Governor's book keeping, but subtly so as not to appear to be rocking a sinking boat.

And last but not least there is Phillip Angelides. "Who the heck is Phillip Angelides?" you ask? And that's the point. Mr. Angelides is the state Treasurer, a Democrat (of course) but with the name recognition level of Barney Rubble's brother-in-law. Phillip Angelides has no compunction about not only rocking the boat but punching another hole in it if it gets his name in the paper, or on the state's California Channel, which covers the minutia of the state legislature up in Sacramento.

The only people who watch this cable channel are high school civic's classes and political junkies. But Mr. Angelides has been all over the channel of late, calling press conference and showing up on talk shows, collecting video tape of himself looking gubernatorial the same way an actor builds an audition reel.

California can thank Gray Davis for all this silliness. It's an unpleasant psychological truth about leadership; we like to think they're nice guys but we're happier if they're bastards. And we don't like voting in the dark.

Kimit Muston's columns appear regularly in the Los Angeles Daily News. If you have any comments regarding his columns he may be reached at inditer.com

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